Wednesday, April 25, 2007

goodbye Kind Rudi

Our special neighbour Rudi died this morning.
He has been battling cancer for a year and they were arranging to take him away from home to Palliative care today, but yesterday they said they didn't know if there would be a bed for him. Fran has been trying to carry him from bed to the couch to keep him moving, but the last few days Rudi has been in so much pain he can't even sit up. Last night Rudi told Fran that he just wanted to die so he wouldn't not be a bother to her anymore, she told him he was no bother and who was going to bother with her if he left her. Then he asked her for a drink and she went to get one and when he took it from her, he died.
Jack and I had the dying talk yesterday as we knew it was coming soon, and have been brainstorming ways we can let Fran know she is loved and that it is okay to be sad. She is going to be so lonely.
I wish I knew how to be of most comfort.
I feel so helpless.

1 comment:

patty-jean said...

i know that just you being there, and your family being there - present - is huge. so many times when there is loss, people don't know what to say or do, and then they end up saying/doing nothing...when sometimes presence it all thats needed.